Christmas things and more

From Asmund: "Dad, you are Santa. The real Santa made you Santa. When I get older, I am going to build you a sleigh. I will get reindeer from the North Pole. Where is the North Pole?"

Asmund doesn't like waiting in the car: "I have a new job. Never going out at night. No buying things, no eating, no having fun."

Wystan likes his nude protests. We ask him to finish eating his beans, he protests, he strips. Ugh!

"Frosty the snowman, Santa come down the christmas tree" -Wystan's version of one of the Frosty verses.

From Carrie Dec 8, 2013: Asmund just asked Wystan if he could cuddle with him. Wystan said yes, then they said merry happy christmas to each other and me, pause, then, "I lud you, Admun" "I love you, Wysan". Talk about heart melting!

My son's imagination:
Asmund-I want yummy food like my mom makes.
Carrie-Awe, I'm glad you like my food.
Asmund-you are not my mom, you are Wystan's mom. My mom is in China. She dropped me off. My mom and dad are on a date with my brother and sister.

Asmund wants a nutcracker. One that comes to life every night.

Asmundism:  "It is time to my brain to wake my powers up. My powers is spider webs in my brain, in my head. So many things can destroy it, like wheat, um, things coming out, being outside in the snow without a blanket or a pillow...so I stay inside and stay warm and cosy."

Yesterday, Raedan reached up, grabbed a hold of the top of the foot stool, pulled himself up to his knees, then his feet. He immediately fell over, but still...

Current back seat conversation, "NO pee or poop! It is a CHRISTMAS song!" "YES pee and poop! POOPIE CHRISTMAS TREE!"

Asmund: "Everyone is poopies, everyone is stinkers, on the whole world. That is the word."

Asmund: "I is ten years old now. Every night I get bigger."
Carrie: "How does that happen?"
Asmund: "Jesus!"

Asumundisms

Asmund wants a pet mouse. Also, he wants a new house with bigger floors and stairs and more roofs and bathrooms and couches and rocking chairs. We need it because of Raedan.

"It is time to my brain to wake my powers up. My powers is spider webs in my brain, in my head. So many things can destroy it, like wheat, um, things coming out, being outside in the snow without a blanket or a pillow...so I stay inside and stay warm and cosy."

"We are a team. That means, 'Move!'"

"I is ten years old now. Every night I get bigger."
Carrie: "How does that happen?"
"Jesus!"

"Who is this card for? Uncle Carl and Aunt Sarah?"
"MOM, I am only making cards for GIRLS right now!!"

Carrie: "In the winter time, we need you to get into your carseats really fast!"
"I AM fast, I am just doing it slowly!"

Christmas Tree

Asmund, shortly after yelling at Carrie that he hated her, gave her a Christmas tree drawing with his note: "Dear Mommy, Happy Christmas. I is sorry I was mean. I love you, ose, when you make me crazy, I still love you. Asmund."

catch up on things

Asmund:

"One spooky night zombies eat brains, but the robots came and knocked them down."

Carrie reports: Asmund told me a secret, he has spider friends who will eat the bugs in our house. He made bug traps to help.

"I have a job!"
"What is it, Asmund?"
"I is a writer and reader of books."

"Bears and rabbits are both dummie heads, but dolphins are cute."

More from Carrie:

Last week Wystan had a nightmare that his ice cream dropped. Last night Asmund had a nightmare that people were killing dolphins. My children's tender hearts melt mine.

Asmund loves the "funny lady movie", and mimics her, in a high pitch voice, saying "a nice cup of tea!!!" (Keeping Up Appearances)

Raedan's first food? Peanut butter!! I think we have Wystan to thank for that mini heart attack but Raedan was absolutely livid when we removed him from his fun. Kid wants to eat!

Wystan: "Mom, look! Me 'piderman!"
Me: "Oh, sweetie, please don't be Spiderman on the fridge door!!"

Outside the new Marco's Pizza, Asmund says

Mom, I see something--it's a restaurant up in the sky! They sell pizza, it is for aliens! The aliens have two eyes.

Asmundisms

Asmund's shopping list: grapes, chocolate ice cream, cold yogurts, hot dogs, and coffee.

Asmund: "Wystan, you don't be scared of spiders or robots or ghosts. I will fight them all."

Sweet moment

Wystan came downstairs with a Batman action figure, and Asmund said it was his, that I was saving it for his birthday. Carrie then asked Wystan what he wanted for his birthday, and he said," A Spider-Man cake." Asmund said, "Yes! We are sharing. Wystan, want me to share my Batman car and it be for your birthday, too?" Wystan agreed, "Uh-huh."

More Asmund

Asmund wants Uncle Ron and I to build an RV, just like our neighbor has and is in the process of fixing up. Asmund will paint it blue, red, and white.

[

"I is the best archer in the whole world. I throw them so high, they 'most reach the moon!"

When letting your friend's chickens out, with a four year old with a new bow and arrows, the sudden quandary, "Mom, I kill rabbits or chickens?"

Asmundisms

Asmund told me he is a writer. He has a notebook and a pencil, and writes poetry.
Asmund: "When I grow up, I'm going to be a stranger in town! I'm going to write and work, and wear big glasses."
Asmund told me we are fighting zombies today.
He also wants to go to see Uncle Carl with his big steps.
Asmund says, "When I eat wheat, I not like my brain."

Song

Wystan's morning song: "My yogurt my yogurt my yogurt is good for my bo-dyyyyy!!"

Me: "What is your book called?"
Asmund: "Go to Sleep, Banana."
Me: "Um...Good Night, Gorilla?"
A: "Yes."

I asked Asmund how the book ends. He pointed to the back and said, "On that side."

Sink Bath

Wystan was naked in the bathroom sink, while the water was overrunning onto the floor. He said, "Want my body washed!"

Necklaces

Wystan, with shoelaces, "Tie my necklace? Pretty all day!"

Letters

Asmund is writing letters to his friends: "I am missing my friends. That is why I am writing their names on these papers, so they know I am here."

Asmund's Brain

Asmund was trying to sleep when we heard the front door cowbell ring.
A: "I know, Brain! I know!"
Me: "What is it, Asmund?"
A: "I can't sleep! I know, Brain!"
Me: "Who are you talking to?"
A: "My brain."
Me: "What is it saying?"
A: "It is saying I can't sleep with the cowbell ringing."
Me: "Hello, Asmund's Brain. We can go to sleep now. The cowbell is no longer ringing. There is only silence. We can sleep well, and have good dreams. Good night."
He was asleep within a minute!

[

Me: Asmund sold me a rat nose he made from Lego bricks for fifty bucks.
Carrie: His prices are going up!! I got a bat nose for ten!

[

From Carrie: The boys think I've given them ice cream for breakfast. Thank you, raw kefir and frozen peaches.

DIY

Asmund: I will get smoothie by myself. Dad, will you get smoothie for me?

[

Asmund, making dinosaur teeth out of chalk, "I know all about teethes of tineastors. Dinasdors."

[

From Carrie:

Daddy Asmund is reading to Baby Wystan. Everything about this arrangement meets my approval.

The nice thing about being the bad cop parent is that when you do something like let them watch tv when they wake up, it's instant Santa Mommy status.

The problem with your toddler having developmentally appropriate fine motor skills is that he can manipulate the door locks.

Baby multitasking--nursing and chewing on fingers. At the same time. Much wrath if the parental discourages this arrangement.

Ways to count

Wystan is learning to count by counting the number of Daleks on the cover of Doctor Who's Series Seven, Part One.

Translations

Our four year old translates what our two year old is saying. W: Cat's hole = castle

A: "I will ask Uncle Carl to dig holes with me."
Carrie: "We're not digging holes in the yard, babe. How about you draw Uncle Carl and Nana birthday cards?"
A: "Not birthday cards. Birthday holes."

From Carrie:

Spa treatment, brother style-Wystan is fitting Raedan's feet into a cup while Asmund washes his face with water he has sucked into his mouth and spit back out.

No, my sweet, still wet from the tub two year old, wearing socks does not equal being dressed.

Asmund is reading to Wystan, "A and H and X and Z, I beat you up on the coconut tree"

Apple Juice

A, hands me new glass: "Dad, you forgot to put apple juice in this."

Yawns

A, this morning: "I don't like yawns. TV will stop my yawns. Turn on the TV, my yawns stop. Turn off the TV, my yawns go."

Hungry

Asmund: "I'm hungry."
Me: "You didn't get enough lunch?"
A: "I didn't get enough ice cream."

Yaeyan

Wystan:
"No! MY Yaeyan!" (My Raedan!)
"Yaeyan yiyaled et me." (Raedan smiled at me.)

Asmund:
"I want my own porch! Uncle Ron will build it for me."

A: "Raedan be my boy cause you have another baby."
C: "Where is my other baby?"
A: "In your tummy!"

Asleep?

Asmund: "I didn't have a nap. That is how I rest my head."

updates

Asmund just told us that he's Supermarket. As in, he's a super hero named Supermarket.

Asmund sweeping, "Why I have to do EVERYTHING!?"

"I think when Wystan and me get bigger, Wystan is going to be my mommy and have babies come out his tummy."

[

Wystan: "Be bop" for Robot.

Me: "We should get some fly paper."
Wystan: "No. Be bop paper." Robot paper.

Wystan said he wants to run and run and run, and eat chocolate. It sounds like this: "Run and run and run, and eat mna-mna."

Mna-mna is short for M and Ms, which he translates as all chocolate.

Fourth of July 2013

Asmund, to Dad: "You're a funny one, like him." Points to Gru on Despicable Me DVD cover.

[

Setting up for the parade, Asmund places flags on the ground "so people know we are having a candlelight dinner." Reference to Hyacinth on Keeping Up Appearances.

Asmund says

Asmund: I want to go up to my bed and rest. My legs are tired.
Me: Why don't you stay down here and lay down?
Asmund: My body says, "No! No! I want to go up to my bed!"

[

Asmund: Bears eat choo-choo trains. No way! Bears eat elephants. No Way! etc.

Star Wars Spy Droids

Asmund: "Bella is my sister. I give her lots of kisses."

Carrie: "Wow! You've built a lot of spy droids [with Legos]. Who are they going to spy on?"
Asmund: "People."

Asmund hugged Carrie's pregnant belly, sat up and said, "I love my baby!" Then he looked concerned and asked Carrie, "Mom, where is my sister, Bella?" She tried not to crack up when she told him she was home with her family.

More fun

Asmund: "I want to put the toys away. I'm tired of dealing with this."

"You throw the ball this way or that way. That is my rules. If you throw it on the couch, you disobey."

Asmund to Wystan Translation

Asmund: "Daddy, I want to play outside with you with chalk!"
Wystan: "Daddy, an ARRR!" (Holds up lego creation Star Wars gun.)

Catching up

Asmund: "The bad guys needed to go bye-bye." After throwing the supervillains across the room.

Hungry robot hippos are attacking.

I talked to Asmund about Women's Studies tonight, but he says he's already heard about it.

Changing around the living room this morning. With every change Asmund says "Yes. That is good, Mom."

After I don't go into the other room like Asmund told me to: "Dad! You are disobeying!"

A lot of catching up

Asmund to Carrie: "Your touch is like rain."

Things Asmund said to Carrie

Your husband is my daddy!

Me want to write a letter to my Dennis.